So there we were, seven of us, Barman, FT, Jaaz, Mufasa, North East Bear, Digits and yours truly sitting in the departure lounge of Glasgow Airport at 6:30 on the Friday morning. The beers were already being supped.
When I say beers I'd like to point out that Barman and moi had opted for the relative safety of the fluorescent girlie drink commonly known as a Bacardi Breezer. Even a liver such as mine, a finely honed, athletic liver that has dedicated itself to a life of alcohol abuse blanched at the thought of Vodka at that time of the morning. The advanced reprobate brigade for the Ulster FF night was on the march.
In no time at all we were met by Ranchman and whisked down the Northern Irish coast. By nine in the morning we still hadn't checked in but the beers, nevertheless, were still being supped in the wee lounge just off the reception area. Barman and moi had grown in confidence by now and had opted for Baileys instead of the girlie stuff. No ice, just a very masculine Baileys straight!
Breakfast, the Ulster fry of course (with beans) was partaken, checking in was done and that was us on the loose. Again there was no breakneck speed, just a leisurely six-hour drinking session in which time we had sorted out Rangers' pathetic PR department and Chris Robinson, among others, was left without a name. By now I had introduced and merged Cointreu with the Baileys. I mean, how more rugged and manly can you get?
Sleep, or rather the lack of it, was starting to hit home and we all agreed that an hour or two in our pits was the sensible way to go. Only thing was, North East Bear isn't that sensible when it comes to putting off the art of beer supping/going the distance. And he decided that seeing as it was still daytime he was staying out on the sauce. Mind you he did have a point the sunshine was helping to work up a thirst.
Truth be told the sleep deprivation part had passed me, by this stage, and so instead of getting those vital couple of hours in bed I did my ablutions and made my way back downstairs where Ranchman, Barman and N_E_B were setting the pace. An hour down the line and our big cuddly Aberdonian bear did finally engage the brain and staggered off up to his room. It was gonna be a long night, not to say weekend.
Friday night came and went and apart from the usual knock backs from the local wimmin, (and we were nice to their guide dogs too) everything went swimmingly. The big bear from the North East of Scotland, Jaaz, FT and Mufasa kept on keeping on, blazing a trail for FF (Digits was elsewhere by this point. A Presbyterian elsewhere it has to be said) whereas the wimp brothers were in bed just by the witching hour. Clearly those straight Baileys were by now taking their toll!
Saturday morning saw us (well some of us) wolfing down our breakfast no problem, whilst others struggled. But hey we got through it and it was off to the Shankill we did go. The Northern Ireland Supporters Club was the first port of call and midway through the afternoon some of the punters who had came over on the Blue Order happy bus that Saturday morning joined us. All had a very pleasant day.
From there we went to the Linfield club for an hour before heading back to the hotel to get showered and glad ragged up for the weekend's main event ñ The Ulster Follow Follow bash. There's no getting away from it, this Internet is a bit of a wheeze and the power it has was brought home to me when I went for a walk to clear the head on the Saturday morning before the day's main events.
If it wasn't for FF on the Internet then I wouldn't have met the countless genuine Rangers people that I have. Barman and I wouldn't have met the likes of Ranchman and forged the links we have. It's the wee seemingly innocuous things as well. Did you know for instance that the RNLI in Bangor have saved 133 lives since May 1965. Did you know that the 1st Port Hotel in Bangor serves eats in the pub at ground level, has a smashing restaurant on the first floor and a 5 star effort on the second floor. And did you know that the Ulster bartender is obsessed with drowning your drink with ice. Not a chunk or two but a fecking glass full!
Anyway our bus duly rolled into the Rangers Supporters Club in Larne, which was established in 1963. It was interesting to note that the Club motto is still the old ‘Aye Ready' as opposed to the modern day ‘Ready' a subject that has raised more questions than answers in recent years.
Our Compere of sorts for the night was Manfromdelmonte from The Blue Order and I'd like to talk for a wee minute about their plight. Between MFDM and Del 157, rarely have I come across two bluenoses as 'scunnered' with their lot as this pair at the bash. Frustrated doesn't even begin to describe how they are feeling at the moment.
The bottom line is TBO members are working their socks off to try and make a success of their organisation and it is important that we never lose sight of their aim. Which is to make Ibrox a better, more atmospheric stadium for Rangers fans to enjoy the match. How can that be wrong?
If you thought the club making a wee bit of effort last season before the Man Utd home CL tie had the desired effect on the crowd then let me just say that TBO had already asked the club for permission beforehand to do the same and were dismissed out of hand. They were told it would be a fire hazard. That is the perplexing and puzzling attitude these guys are up against.
Their frustration was brought home when I thought back to a conversation I had the previous day with Ranchman who has been to umpteen South American football matches and had enthused to us about the behaviour and antics of the 'Ultras' before, during and after a derby match in Rio. He said they make the fervour of the Italians in the same scenario look positively tame by comparison.
TBO aren't asking for the moon all they want is to brighten and wake up Ibrox on a match day. They're not going to go bonkers and bring in Lambeg drums; they're not going to come dressed in Orange Band uniforms. All they want is to rouse the crowd out of their slumber once in a while. And when you consider how clubs elsewhere in the world actively work hand in hand with their fans to promote a good atmosphere, then you begin to realise how sickening it must be for TBO members at this time when they come up against the brick wall that is Laurence McIntyre. Put it this way, if TBO fail and are allowed to fall by the wayside then Ibrox really will end up a ghost town and goodness knows it's bad enough as it is.
But getting back to the bash. I think it's fair to say that the night was a resounding success and thanks must go to Limavady Bluenose and Richard from Larne for organising the night. (Apologies if I've missed anyone out) Thanks also must go to TBO people who organised a mini bus, which I'm sure will be bigger next time around. New contacts were made and ties were strengthened, as is always the case.
Of course we shouldn't forget that halfway through the bash our day was made complete when a cardboard box with a yahoo teddy bear was ushered in. Words fail me. They're in the CL and we're not. They've just made a yahoo record of consecutive OF wins. They're 40 odd zillion less in debt than we are, and still they cannot live without us. Thank you small town bhoys for the pressie. Your obsession keeps me warm at night.
All that was left was for the straggling seven to hit the hotel lounge in the wee small hours and keep the party spirit going, which we did! Hell, I even managed to stay up till 3 o'clock. The following day saw some seriously bleary eyes and heavy shoulders. But hey I wouldn't have it any other way.
Yours in Rangers, looking forward to next year already, (well the liver will have recovered by then)
The Govanhill Gub.