Venue - Station Park, Forfar.
Cast? My old man and his brothers and their old man, plus a various assortment of pals.
Now I don't know if they went with the Mermaid Bus at this point or whether it was the bus that picked up at the 20 Club Orange Halls. That doesn't really matter and is intended really to rile any yahoos peering in and lurking.
Anyway, my old man and his troupe, along with nearly 11,000 others, are shoehorned into Station Park for a second round Scottish Cup tie.
But there was a fly in the ointment. The fly being my granda. Being a season ticket holder at Ibrox since the late 1940s, he had no truck with this standing at games. That was strictly for the plebs and not for him.
So midway through the first half my old man and Co. start waving their hankies to attract the attention of the medics doing the rounds around the ground.
'We've got an auld buddy here who has taken a bad turn and is feeling claustrophobic in this packed crowd' was their ruse to get him out of the terracing.
Sure enough the sob story worked and five minutes later my granda has a cosy billet behind the goals sitting on a medicine box.
He's all smiles at this point; peering back, winking at my old man and Co. and giving them the thumbs up. This is the doddles, was his reasoning. I've got a seat and you lot are standing in the freezing cold.
However, the doddles were about to come to an abrupt end. Because out of nowhere a medic appeared and proceeded to stick a dessert spoonful of Cod Liver Oil down the auld yin's thrapple. Much to the astonishment and disgust of him and very much to the amusement of the others, who were in the terracing, pissing themselves laughing.
For the record, Rangers scored seven that day, but there were no more winks and thumbs up from the incumbent on the medicine box. He had learned a harsh lesson. Those medics do a thorough job.
Yours in Rangers,
The Govanhill Gub.